The Necessity of Unfriending

I am slowly, somewhat stealthily beginning to unfriend those who have recently posted annoying responses to some of my Facebook posts. I am sure many people are familiar with this in the post-election 2014 era: you have ‘friends’ on Facebook who are a conglomeration of neighbours, acquaintances, people whom you exchanged business cards with in a bank, went to school with aeons ago, and whatnot. Now, every time you open your mouth (virtually speaking) to say a doubting word about the wonderful new PM, you have sundry names from this amorphous list pop up and give you a rap on the knuckles (also virtually speaking).

Now I have weathered many real-life raps from a legion of folks, but something goes against the grain in submitting to this chastising. Why should I have to justify my beliefs to those who can see no wrong where things are manifestly so? Why should I continue to have them on my ‘friend’ list when we are clearly ideological enemies, as far apart as the legendary poles? And when will I begin to fully use the marvelous privacy settings Facebook has given me? All these questions have only one action as their answer – unfriend and move on, with utmost serenity.

So I did, and am doing, and am feeling oddly happy and protected most hours. It is in the middle of the night, immediately after going to the loo that one begins to wonder – is this really honouring the spirit of democracy? Am I turning into the creatures I hate – those that can not brook any dissidence from their own, insular views? Shouldn’t I let my Facebook wall be a flowering of diverse opinions to truly reflect what I want Indian society to be?

Much pondering in the said hours of night, assisted by the determined kneading of my cats on my blanketed thigh, have produced the answers to these questions as well. They are, Yes, No and No, in that order. I am no guiltier than someone who walks away with his or her bag of vegetables from a street side discussion on politics when I unfriend and move on. Neither of us is really letting down the spirit of democracy. Even if I tried my hardest to be rude, obnoxious and demonically destructive towards people of another viewpoint, I couldn’t begin to resemble some of the specimens I daily suffer on TV. And I don’t mind you singing paeans of praise to the new PM or any one else, but let it not be on my wall. I am not preventing any cheers for Modi, Amit Shah, the VHP or Subramaniam Swamy. Just choosing to sit closer to the music I can hear just under the sloganeering and propaganda.

These times have made a necessity of un-friending even for the most kind-hearted among us.